Friday Fictioneers – Vanished

Every week, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (thank you, Rochelle!) hosts a flash fiction challenge, to write a complete story, based on a photoprompt, with a beginning, middle and end, in 100 words or less. Post it on your blog, and include the Photoprompt and Inlinkz on your page. Link your story URL. Then the fun starts as you read other peoples’ stories and comment on them!

PHOTO PROMPT (C) BRADLEY HARRIS

Vanished

Mags and I wandered along the coast path. Sonorous waves breathed calmly, and countless bees hummed in the heather. I gave Mags a hug, and she grinned at me.

‘What’s that for, Mum?’ she asked.

‘Oh, because I love you! And because I want to tell you about your dad.’

She stiffened.

‘Tom and I were on that beach. We’d been quarrelling – we often did – but we made up. Afterwards, I dozed, and when I woke, Tom had gone. I never saw him again.’

Briefly Mags was silent, then, ‘Would you mind if I looked for him, Mum?’ she asked.

Inlinkz – click here to join the fun!

55 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Vanished

    • Dear Rochelle
      Thank you for your comment, which was very helpful. I realised when I read it that the story didn’t make it clear that Tom’s disappearance had happened before Mags was born. I’d done an extensive rewrite of the original draft, and somehow lost the bit that said Mags was conceived on the beach, and Tom had then disappeared. Careless Penny!
      Shalom
      Penny
      xx

      Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your comment, Keith. Tom may have walked away; then again he may have been taken away by person or persons unknown…or Mum may be lying…The solid fact is, though, as you say; he left a living reminder of what happened on the beach that day.

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  1. Wonderful write – I saw your response to Rochelle and that does change one’s idea of the whats and such.
    Oh jeez! I don’t know why but I just had an image of “Mama Mia”! At least there is only one potential dad! And, hopefully Mum will have more info to give Mags to help her in her search…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for commenting, i b. Yes, Mum has had tragedy in her life. I feel, though, that she and her daughter are very close, and I’m sure this gives both of them both happiness and joy.

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  2. I had a hunch that Mags was conceived on the beach and saw it confirmed in the comments. I can understand that she wants to get to know her father, most of us want to know where we came from. I hope she won’t be disappointed. They don’t seem to have talked much about him in the past.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Gabi. You always read my stories very perceptively. You’re right that they haven’t spoken much about Mags’s father. I wonder why not? I’m sure Mags would have been curious…

      Liked by 1 person

  3. An important moment here, captured beautifully in the dialogue between these two. Having just been on a DNA journey myself to search for a similarly ‘lost’ parent for someone close to me, this story really resonated with me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Aw, did he go before even knowing he was going to have a child? Does he know? She makes it sound like she wants to see him again, not that she is angry that he left in the first place. So much conflict to feel in a case like this.

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  5. The question that she knew would come one day? Of course it would. And all she can do now is stand by and hope that her daughter’s love for her will never change. She need not worry. The very fact that the question was asked shows they have an unbreakable bond.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for such a perceptive and empathic comment, Jilly. During her childhood, Mags could see that mention of her father distressed her mum. Wanting her mum to be happy, she learned to stay silent. But, of course, as you say, the question as bound to come some day. It says much for the strength of their love that Mags respects her mum’s wishes enough to wait until she was prepared to talk about Tom.

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