Every week, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (thank you, Rochelle!) hosts a flash fiction challenge, to write a complete story, based on a photoprompt, with a beginning, middle and end, in 100 words or less. Post it on your blog, and include the Photoprompt and Inlinkz on your page. Link your story URL. Then the fun starts as you read other peoples’ stories and comment on them!
PHOTO PROMPT © Douglas M. MacIlroy
Grace notes
Back and forth, back and forth went the rocking chair as Lizzie waited.
Her back twinged and she grimaced.
Early spring sunshine brightened the room. Lizzie could see the cheerful yellow daffodils in her yard.
She eyed the phone. Would it ring? No, her daughter had rung in the morning. She never rang twice in a day. Lizzie told herself not to be greedy.
A bird perched on the window-ledge. Lizzie wished she wasn’t deaf.
But she heard it!
Birdsong! A blackbird’s melodious tones. A thrush. A robin’s piping.
The notes tumbled over each other.
The light grew and grew.
Great last sentence which leads into the deliverance
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Dear Neil
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad you felt the forward momentum of the last sentence.
With very best wishes
Penny
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It seems like a pleasant way to go, in the sunshine, accompanied by birdsong. Not bad at all.
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Dear Iain
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, I agree – not a bad way to go. A bit lonely perhaps, but also perhaps exhilarating.
With very best wishes
Penny
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And may it grow even more. Nice one.
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Dear Anthony
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, a crescendo of birdsong and light until the end.
With best wishes
Penny
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It sounds like her ending was like a warm welcome (and hopefully a beginning)
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Dear Bjorn
Thank you for reading and commenting. I like your description of her ending being like a warm welcome. I, too, hope that it was the beginning of her life in heaven.
With very best wishes
Penny
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Oh, that was simply lovely, Penny!
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
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Dear Susan
Thank you for reading and for your appreciative comment. I’m glad you enjoyed the story.
With very best wishes
Penny
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That’s a warming thought. If only we could all go like that.
Coincidentally, I have a Lizzie this week, too.
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Dear Nobbin
Thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comment. I’m glad the story warmed you.
With very best wishes
Penny
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Probably the most peaceful death I’ve ever read of in Friday Fictioneers, and there has been a lot of deaths. Really great writing to turn something that could be morbid into something strangely lovely.
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Dear Lauren
Thank you for reading and for the insight of your comments. Your comment about Friday Fictioneers made me smile – we do tend to be a murderous lot, don’t we? I’m glad you found the story lovely, though – that’s what I was aiming for.
With very best wishes
Penny
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Nicely told,
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Dear Mike
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad you thought the story was nicely told.
With best wishes
Penny
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I can relate to waiting for a call and knowing the routine. Thank goodness for birdsong to fill in the ‘tween times. Good story.
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Dear Jade
Thank you for reading and commenting. When you’re old and your family are all busy living their own lives, it must be very lonely waiting for that phone call.
With best wishes
Penny
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I wonder if she always had a relationship with birds her entire life. I hope death is this peaceful. I found the birds comforting like she wasn’t alone.
Great story Penny.
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Dear Tannille
Thank you for reading and commenting. What a very interesting question you ask! Yes, it seems quite likely that she’d always had a relationship with birds, doesn’t it?
With very best wishes
Penny
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Dear Penny,
As I write in the still dark of morning, my window’s open and I’m delighting in birdsong. Lizzie’s crossing over makes me smile. Poignant and gentle story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Thank you for reading and for your empathic comments. I’m glad you smiled – I was hoping for that response.
Shalom
Penny
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it was a long time coming, but she’ll take it with a joy in her heart.
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Dear Plaridel
Thank you for reading and commenting.
With best wishes
Penny
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A gentle slip into a peaceful end. So softly and nicely told but also sad that she was alone wishing for her daughter to be there.
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Dear James
Thank you for reading and commenting so thoughtfully. Yes, it was sad that her daughter wasn’t there but nowadays that is always likely to be the case. If we live a long life, we must be prepared for loneliness at its end. I shall be happy if my children stay in touch (looking good so far!) even if it’s only once a week, as long as I know how they’re getting on. Lizzie knew that; it was why she told herself she shouldn’t be greedy.
With very best wishes
Penny
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This was a lovely write, Penny. Wouldn’t it be nice if that was how we all went into the next realm? Gently and with whatever we had lost returned to accompany us.
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Dear Dale
Thank you for reading, and for the empathic comments. It would be lovely if that was how we went into the next realm.
With very best wishes
Penny
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It would take away the fear, don’t you think?
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Yes, I think it would. xx
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Beautiful. 🙂
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Dear Susan
Thank you for reading and commenting.
With best wishes
Penny
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A lovely take on the prompt – sad, but beautiful too.
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Dear Clare
Thank you for reading and commenting. It was the over-exposed area of the photograph that gave me the inspiration; and the bird, of course!
With best wishes
Penny
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Sunshine, flowers, bird song, the perfect goodbye.
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Dear Trent
Thank you for reading and commenting. I completely agree with you.
With very best wishes
Penny
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A gentle death, as much as any of us can hope for
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Dear CE
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, death came gently for Lizzie.
With very best wishes
Penny
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Slipping away peacefully in a rocking chair, not such a bad way to go,
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Dear Ali
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, when you’ve got to go this is as good a way as any.
With very best wishes
Penny
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This is very powerful, Penny. You’ve captured all the senses and the momentous occasion that bis death. There was no whimper to the end of her life but a celebration. Well done
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Dear Michael
Thank you for reading and for your very kind comments. The over-exposed area of the photograph made me think of the light growing brighter and brighter, and that really gave me the story. You’re right about the celebration. Her death was gentle, as many commenters have noted, but yes, the feeling of celebration was strong in my mind as I wrote.
With very best wishes
Penny
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I found your story moving and subtle Penny. You created a vivid scene and a peaceful ending. Well written.
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Dear Francine
Thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comments. I’m glad you found the story moving.
With very best wishes
Penny
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A beautiful way to leave this silent world for a glorious, musical Otherworld 🙂
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Dear Linda
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, I think we all hope to pass over with a sense of hope and renewal.
With very best wishes
Penny
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What a lovely thing, beautiful, how many would wish to go I’m sure
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Dear Minister
Thank you for reading and commenting so kindly. Yes, I would certainly like to go like that.
With very best wishes
Penny
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