Every week, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (thank you, Rochelle!) hosts a flash fiction challenge, to write a complete story with a beginning, middle and end in 100 words or less. Post it on your blog, and include the Photoprompt and Inlinkz on your page. Link your story URL. Then the fun starts as you read other peoples’ stories and comment on them!
PHOTO PROMPT © Fatima Fakier Deria
Farewell!
We were late. The driver was just about to close the rear door of the bus as we rounded the corner. He shouted, “Quickly! My bus leaves on time.” The other passengers grinned. The bus was never punctual.
Mike took my backpack.
“Here, I’ll pass it up to you.”
I climbed into the bus, which smelt pungent. A hairy head with a wispy white beard leaned towards me. Heavens! A goat!
I grabbed my pack.
Mike gestured to the driver to shut the door.
“Enjoy the rest of the holiday,” he grinned.
What? He’s supposed to be coming too!
Ha, packed off for a pleasant journey! Perhaps they will have the last laugh though – this could be the start of the adventure of a lifetime!
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Dear Iain
Thank you for reading and commenting. You never know – the narrator’s an adventurous young woman, so I’m sure she’ll make the best of suddenly being dumped by Mike.
With very best wishes
Penny
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In some places, you are never far from a goat! Nice one.
Here’s mine!
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Dear Keith
Thank you for reading and commenting. Goats get everywhere!
With best wishes
Penny
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sneaky Mike! Is he well-intentioned towards her i wonder
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Dear Neil
Thank you for reading and commenting. Is Mike well-intentioned? Definitely not! He’s a double-dealing, two-faced love rat and he’s dumped her!
With very best wishes
Penny
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What started as an excursion has been bumped up to adventure. I love the part about the goat. So funny!
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Dear Jade
Thank you for reading and commenting. The goat’s funny? That’s the only bit of the story that’s true! 😉
With best wishes
Penny
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Yes, I do, especially if the person thought they were looking at a person and realized it was a goat 🙂
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Just you wait … she’ll have the last laugh! And that goat? He’s gonna tell the best stories she’d ever heard … 😉 Lovely, Penny!
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Dear Na’ama
Thank you for reading and commenting. The best stories she’s ever heard – between belches and trying to eat her sunhat! I agree with you – I think she’ll have the last laugh!
With very best wishes
Penny
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🙂 And he’ll be bored and sad and left out … 😉
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Dumping her is bad. Dumping her in the company of a smelly goat is just unforgivable!
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Dear Linda
Thank you for reading and commenting. The narrator is an adventurous soul. I think she’ll strike up a conversation with the old lady who owns the goat, and learn all sorts of fascinating things about her journey!
With very best wishes
Penny
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That would certainly be making the best of a bad situatiion 🙂
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That Mike! So not cool to just up and dump her into a bus like that!
I hope she ends up having the last laugh, goat and all.
What a great read, Penny,
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Dear Dale
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments. No, Mike was not cool – still, what do you expect from a young man who wears his baseball cap back-to-front? I’m sure she’ll have the last laugh; especially as she’s going to text Mike’s sister and let her know what a ratfink he’s been!
With very best wishes
Penny x
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You’ve just given me even more of the story (sneaky, you!) And ratfink is the perfect term…
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Nice guy, that Mike. Not. Excellent detail!
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Dear Sascha
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments. I’m glad you liked the detail.
With very best wishes
Penny
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A gentleman always makes sure his date gets on the bus first. Just doesn’t usually dump her like that though. Still, she’s in for an interesting ride.
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Dear Sandra
Thank you for reading and commenting. As you say, she’s in for an interesting ride! And she’s the sort of woman who is stimulated by adversity – she won’t mope, she’ll throw herself even more enthusiastically into learning about the place she’s visiting.
With very best wishes
Penny
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I wasn’t expecting that! I hope she has a wonderful time and Mike doesn’t – because what he did to her was a bit mean. You painted a vivid picture: the chaos and rush and I loved the bit about the goat.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
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Dear Susan
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments. Yes, when you meet a goat on a bus it can be a little disconcerting!
With very best wishes
Penny
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Dear Penny,
Perhaps the owner of the animal is on his way to his Goat Yoga class. 😉 At any rate, you described the scene well enough I felt as though I was there. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comments. I had to resort to Google to discover what Goat Yoga is. I’ll stick to Downward Facing Dog I think and leave the kids to fool around on their own…I’m very pleased you thought I described the scene well.
Shalom
Penny
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Mike’s off to the beach. Much better than a smelly bus 🙂
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Dear Ali
Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, Mike’s off to the beach, with a beer and a blonde, gold-digging tart who’ll take him for every cent before dumping him unceremoniously! I think he should have stuck with the bus…
With very best wishes
Penny
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I’m going to say, I think she’s better off without Mike. Hope she has an awesome journey.
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Dear Siobhan
Thank you for reading and commenting. I agree – the callous way Mike dumped her shows that she’s better off without him. I think she’ll be determined to make her journey as satisfying as possible, and will enjoy it all the more.
With best wishes
Penny
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I bet she had a fab time without him.
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Wow, I think she’s better off and her adventure will be more enjoyed without flaky Mike. Onwards! =)
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Dear Brenda
Thank you for reading and commenting. I agree she’s better off without flaky Mike. And upwards! 😉
With very best wishes
Penny
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That was cruel of him to do to her. Makes for a great story, though.
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Dear Bear
Thank you for reading and commenting.
I love your gentle heart! You’re right – Mike was cruel in the way he dumped her. I’m glad you enjoyed the story despite this. And my own take on how the narrative continues is very positive. She doesn’t need Mike, and she’ll have a great time getting to know the country she’s visiting and its people.
With very best wishes
Penny
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i wonder what is worse: dumped into a bus or thrown under the bus. i guess it depends on one’s perspective? 🙂
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Dear Plaridel
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’ll take being dumped into a bus any time over being thrown under it! At least I’ll probably get somewhere interesting!
With best wishes
Penny
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D’you know, Penny, I never liked that Mike…
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Dear CE
Thank you for reading and commenting.
I’m sure you’re right – Mike was not really very likeable. All the little clues of selfishness and callousness would have been there.
With best wishes
Penny
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Now Mike is just mean. The protagonist should send post cards “wish you were here, glad you’re not”.
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What a coward! Hope the journey ends up one of self discovery. We have goats in the street, sometimes crossing at the pedestrian crossings, but never on the bus!
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Haha…that was unexpected.
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