Friday Fictioneers – Window on the Heavens

Every week, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (thank you, Rochelle!) hosts a flash fiction challenge, to write a complete story, based on a photoprompt, with a beginning, middle and end, in 100 words or less. Post it on your blog, and link your story URL. Then the fun starts as you read other peoples’ stories and comment on them!

FF - Window on the Heavens 190919

Photoprompt © J Hardy Carroll

Window on the Heavens

At first I was frightened.

The fall had concussed me. My hip hurt like hell, and I couldn’t stand up – couldn’t even crawl.

My children had told me I should always carry my phone, but I’ve never taken good advice.

I tried calling for help. My voice sounded strange, feeble and quavering. Nobody came.

Soon it was dark. Starshine crept in through the skylight. So did the cold. I shook.

The pain was subsiding. My mind felt strangely lucid. I was going to die, here, on my kitchen floor. I watched the glorious, terrible darkness through the window above…

 

44 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Window on the Heavens

    • Dear Neil
      Thank you for reading and for your kind comments. You really “got” what I wanted to convey. The narrator had come to terms with her mortality many years before and had realized that a fall was a likely outcome of staying independent. Despite the pain she was at peace.

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  1. Point of view in the literal sense is everything this week. This story is hard for me to read, having spent the last three months watching the struggle, in the wake of a near-fatal period of aloneness, following a fall…but well captured Penny, as usual. Though filled with despair…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Isn’t it interesting how so many of us went that way? I think it is the vantage point, along with the reality that kitchen and bathrooms often hold the greatest chance for slip-n-fall and for the potentially tragic aftermath.
    Nicely painted in words, my friend.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Tannille
      Thank you for reading and commenting. It would be nice if such accidents never happened, but, do you know? If I had to risk dying like that in order to retain my independence, I would take the risk.
      With very best wishes
      Penny

      Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Bjorn
      Thank you for reading and commenting. Safety is relative – as I become more infirm I know I will have to balance safety with living independently; and we all have to die sometime…
      With very best wishes
      Penny

      Like

    • Dear Abhijit
      Thank you for reading and commenting. The narrator had accepted her mortality, and felt that this was a satisfactory way to die. There was no lingering, no years of helpless dependence on others, just the chance to reflect lucidly on the conclusion of her life. (To avoid ambiguity, this was definitely accident and not suicide).
      With very best wishes
      Penny

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  3. Great description, Penny. I remember when they first came out with those alarms for the elderly. I use a walker and am very careful. My balance is poor and my back not good. If not for the walker I wouldn’t be able to move around. Living where I do I can afford a caregiver. There’s no lift in this older building though, but they’re going to move us temporarily and rebuild. —- Suzanne

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