“What Pegman saw” is a weekly challenge based on Google Streetview. You can read the rules here. You can find today’s location on this page, from where you can also get the Inlinkz code. Many thanks to Karen and Josh for organising this most stimulating prompt!
Balbulol Dive Resort, Indonesia | Lera 76, Google Maps
Follower
He’s here again, not doing anything, just sitting and watching me.
At first he hid. He’s bolder now, in plain view.
I chant invocations as I shovel ash from a bonfire into a sack and put it into my outrigger. Nine and ninety days it has sat in sun and rain, and now it’s ready to bless the land and the sea.
I paddle hard for hours, and as I approach the atoll the sun is at its zenith. Has my pursuer had the stamina to keep up with me? I can’t see him. Perhaps the heat has overcome him? I shrug. If it has, he will not do.
I have been quick. The sun must be three-quarters through her journey before I scatter the ash. I eat and drink, and, behold, my hunter paddles slowly to the beach. His head droops.
He’ll do. I shall make him my apprentice.
Great story. Reminds me a bit of Crusoe discovering Friday.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Josh
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad you enjoyed the story.
With best wishes
Penny
LikeLike
Intriguing story. I like how the watcher is being watched back as each evaluates one another. It made me curious if this was based on an actual ritual.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Karen
Thank you for reading and commenting. I don’t know whether there are actual rituals like this – it wouldn’t surprise me! The theme of the would-be apprentice stalking the shaman was suggested by an element of Hesse’s Glass Bead Game. The setting, with the shaman nurturing the reef environment by the careful administration of nutrients, is my own and original. When I was researching for the story, I came across references to these islands having the greatest marine biodiversity in the world, despite being relatively nutrient-poor. I wondered whether human intervention over centuries might have played a part.
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nice! It rings true to me as a way of testing someone (a follower) to see if they’re good enough to start training. I like how ambiguous it is early on, and that first hint of the truth with “if he has, he will not do.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Joy
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments. It’s rather like a courtship, isn’t it? Shaman/apprentice must be a very close relationship, and one would imagine that selection would be mutual.
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLiked by 2 people
I like that idea, that it’s like a courtship — yes.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nicely done and interesting spin on possible ‘entrance exams’ for apprenticeship … 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Na’ama
Thank you for reading and commenting. I think the relationship between shaman and apprentice would be a very close one. This would lead to some mutuality in the selection process, I think.
With best wishes
Penny
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I would think at most often it would be a mutual kind of thing, to the extent the children had any real say or choice … but they probably had some ‘say’ in their actions and reactions. …
LikeLiked by 1 person
Seems everyone has already said what I would say. Whether this is a genuine shaman-apprentice test or not, the way you’ve written it makes it seem real.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Crispina
Thank you for reading and commenting so kindly. That my story seems real is perhaps the highest compliment you could pay me – thank you so much!
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLiked by 1 person
I thank you, Penny. And big smiles to you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Absolutely awesome, Penny. A real change in style for you. That last line is just fabulous.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Kelvin
Thank you for reading and for your very kind comments. I’m interested that you feel it is a change of style. I’m not particularly aware of having a style, I just try to tell the story as clearly as I can! I’m very pleased that you found the reveal effective.
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLike
Reblogged this on Kelvin M. Knight and commented:
One of my favourite stories this year from a writer who oozes panache.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Kelvin
This is very kind of you. I’m delighted you enjoyed the story so much. It’s great to have the extra exposure of my work as well!
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLike
Having been an apprentice, I associated with your story… yes, the apprentice is always being tested……
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Ivor
Thank you for reading and commenting. As you say, the apprentice is always being tested. I suspect that this shaman’s apprentice will face some fierce testing in the years ahead – but then, the tasks the shaman must do will take him into dangerous environments. Only the strongest will survive!
With best wishes
Penny
LikeLike
I love the feeling of the hunt, the hunter and the hunted, that comes through in this story. At first we think it may have a sinister outcome but what a great reveal when it’s clear this has been an initiation. Fab writing as always, heavy with atmosphere.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Lynn
Thank you for reading and commenting so kindly. I’m glad sinister came across so clearly, and that the reveal was effective.
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLiked by 1 person
My pleasure Penny 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I like he ides of a courtship too (read comments) and what brought this action forth with more flavor was some of the wording:
“Nine and ninety”
“And behold”
Added to making it feel like a real account
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dear Prior
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m particularly pleased that you liked ‘nine and ninety’ and ‘and, behold,’ which were, as you say, added to make it feel like a real account, more specifically, a real account by a man, a shaman, who has chosen to live his life by ritual.
With very best wishes
Penny
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike
What a fascinating story. I feel like I want to be in this world and see it all for real.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for your kind comment, Anne. The Pegman challenge was a great one, because it gave 150 words, which is enough to allow some character development, which adds to the attraction of the story.
LikeLike