“What Pegman saw” is a weekly challenge based on Google Streetview, to write a story of about 150 words in response to a location prompt. It’s great fun, especially reading and commenting on the stories submitted. You can read the rules here. You can find today’s location on this page, from where you can also get the Inlinkz code. This week’s location is Rams Island, Northern Ireland.
Accident
The empty windows of the lodge stared blindly into the night.
“No! Take your hands off!”
Annie O’Neil struggled with Sergeant Cardew, who was being a great deal too amorous for her liking.
He laughed and drawled, “Come on, sweetheart. You know you want to!”
“You’re just a gobshite!” she hissed, and spat at him.
His face darkened. He slapped her face three times, not especially hard, just to shake her. Annie lashed out with sudden violence and swivelled to flee, but rain had left the ground muddy and slick. She pitched forward, hit her head and lay still.
“Come on, Annie. Stop playing games.”
He reached down, turned her head, saw the wound, the open eyes, the frozen features.
“Shit.”
Glancing round apprehensively, he saw the lodge. It was easy to force a window, and the fire that some ‘careless’ GI started there that night reduced everything to ashes.
Ooh, there’s a grim end to poor Annie. Will she get justice? Will the sergeant be found out or will those GIs be blamed after all? Chilling story Penny
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Dear Lynn
Thank you for reading and commenting. This is based on a true story. A unit of the American Eighth Army Airforce was stationed on the island. The lodge had an extensive wine cellar, and when it burned down the fire was blamed on some careless GIs. I couldn’t help wondering whether the truth might have been darker…
With best wishes
Penny
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It’s little snippets of stories like this that can grow into bigger tales. Store that one away for something longer, perhaps? Wonderful writing as always
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Dear Lynn
Thank you for that wonderfully encouraging comment about this being a seedling for a longer story. I shall certainly file the idea. It would be an exciting challenge!
With very best wishes
Penny
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It definitely has potential, Penny. I can feel the atmosphere coming off the screen.
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A grim little tale, and very well told. I imagine they didn’t look too closely then at such things. My first novel featured a serial-murdering B-17 pilot wreaking havoc in the Midlands during the war.
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Dear Josh
Thank you for reading and commenting. No, I don’t think the fire would have been scrutinised too closely. I hope your B-17 pilot came to an appropriately sticky end. Did you make much play of the dichotomy between the heroism of his combat missions and the evil of his alter-ego’s murder spree?
With best wishes
Penny
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Oh! A delightfully told but grim tale. I’m reading At The Wolf’s Table about food tasters for Hitler. This fit right in! Thanks.
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Dear Lish
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad you enjoyed the way I told the story.
With very best wishes
Penny
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I agree with her assessment of him!
I think the pivot of this story is the moment when he slapped her, and I love the way you put it: “not especially hard.”
This gives a sneak preview of his cruelty and his dismissiveness of his victim’s suffering.
I suppose, in his mind, the head injury was “not especially lethal, ” and the fire was “not especially hot.” Pivots in your point of view help make the point, that to him, her point of view was not especially important.
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Dear Andi
Thank you for reading and commenting.
And what a lovely comment! You really pinpointed the mechanics of the story, and helped me understand better how it worked. I had written “not especially hard” without really understanding why I’d done so, except that it felt necessary – and you’ve told me exactly why it’s necessary. Thank you!
With very best wishes
Penny
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You tell the story in a terse and powerful way – not a word wasted – love it. Vivid sense of the encounter- I wanted to slap the Sergeant ! Poor Annie is treated like a rag doll. Do you think this kind of thing happened ?
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Dear Francine
Thank you for reading and commenting thoughtfully.
Do I think this kind of thing happened? Well, probably yes. The fire at the lodge on the island seems to be true, and it was apparently blamed on GIs stationed there. I expect that most men, including GIs, behaved well towards women, although there would have been a level of casual disregard for their views and integrity that we would find unacceptable today. I fear that many men would have felt that Annie was ‘asking for it’, by going with the sergeant into a situation where she was vulnerable – and, alas, that view is still there in the background today.
With very best wishes
Penny
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It was a fine finish to a well built tale of the times. Leaving an intriguing question mark. Would Sergeant Cardew get his just desserts? Sadly, probably not. 😒
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Dear John
Thank you for reading and commenting. I doubt whether the blaze at the lodge was investigated very carefully – the authorities had more important things to worry about. I suspect Sergeant Cardew escaped scot free.
With very best wishes
Penny
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Smashing story-telling, Penny. You’ve crafted a plausible and chilling tale. I agree that characterizing the blows as “not especially hard” really does some heavy lifting character-wise.
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Dear Karen
Thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comments, especially for confirming the importance of the blows being “not especially hard”. Technical comments like that are just so helpful!
It was a great prompt you picked!
With very best wishes
Penny
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