Friday Fictioneers – Promises, Promises

Every week, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (thank you, Rochelle!) hosts a flash fiction challenge, to write a complete story, based on a photoprompt, with a beginning, middle and end, in 100 words or less. Post it on your blog, and include the Photoprompt and Inlinkz (the blue frog) on your page. Link your story URL. Then the fun starts as you read other peoples’ stories and comment on them!

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Promises, Promises

“Hank, I love you, hold me tight!”

“Sure, honey. Jus’ lemme finish this cigarette.”

Hank took two long drags, then crushed the butt beneath his heel. “Hey, look at the time!”

He climbed into the driver’s seat and turned the key. “Darn!”

He scanned the lifeless engine. “We’ll hitch. I’ll pick up the auto later.”

A couple months later when she missed her second period, Lois spoke to Hank.

“The baby must be yours; I h’aint been with nobody else.”

“Don’t worry, kid. I got this great new job in Seattle. I’ll call you when I gotta place for us.”

65 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Promises, Promises

    • Dear Rochelle
      Thank you for reading and for your kind comments. Yes, Hank is not a man of his word. I hope Lois somehow finds the strength to be a successful single mom – there are many of them, and all credit to them.


    • Dear James
      Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m interested in your take on the story. You’re right; Lois attempting to deceive Hank is certainly a possible reading of the story. In my mind, Lois could see the doubt in Hank’s face and was trying to convince him of something she knew to be true, but of course the reader is not bound by the writer’s opinion!
      With very best wishes

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Oh, Lois, Lois! Why do women fall for trashy losers like this? Love how you summed up Hank’s character in that opening – “Sure, honey. Jus’ lemme finish this cigarette.” Well, if he can’t put his fag out for her …
    Beautifully written and constructed as always Penny

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Right from the beginning, it’s obvious that Hank isn’t keen on spending much time with her. Why else would he insist on finishing his cigarette, and then comment immediately on how late it was?
    Your story is a such a good example of showing rather than telling.

    Liked by 1 person

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