“What Pegman saw” is a weekly challenge based on Google Streetview. Using the 360 degree view of the location provided, you must write a piece of flash fiction of no more than 150 words. You can read the rules here. You can find today’s location on this page, from where you can also get the Inlinkz code. Today’s location is Casablanca.
Going solo
The cabin walls pressed in on her. In port, the cruise ship had looked huge to Darcey’s fourteen-year-old eyes, but at sea its steel superstructure imprisoned her.
Arrival in Casablanca was a relief. She slipped a note under her parents’ door.
“Gone sightseeing. Back in time for dinner.”
Her pulse quickened as she entered the Ancienne Medina. This was foreign! The streets were lined with stalls selling fabric and food, spice and souvenirs. Darcey wrinkled her nose.
A goat bleated frantically. As she watched, a man briskly drew a knife across the creature’s neck, and the blood gushed out.
Nauseated, Darcey entered a shop selling fabric. A man moved and blocked the exit.
The draped samples of cloth darkened the shop, blocking her view of the street.
“We have finer fabrics in the back?”
“Thank you – no!” gasped Darcey.
She pushed past the man, and ran for it.
Autumn Leaves 
Glad she made it out of there. I feared the worst.
When I saw you intended for your fourteen-year-old to go exploring Casablanca alone, I knew she was in for it.
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Thanks for reading and commenting, James.
Taking on a foreign bazaar is an essential growing up experience for the modern young woman!
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If she hadn’t escaped, she might not have gotten any older.
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Wah, thanks for the very vivid solo trip you took me on.
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Dear Lavanya
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad you found your trip vivid!
With best wishes
Penny
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Vivid was the very word I was going to use. I think the merchant really did keep the better stuff in the back… more of a culture shock than any nefarious dealings. I like the rhythm of the piece.
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Spot on, Josh! That was exactly what I had in mind.
And thank you for ‘vivid’ – that’s a lovely word for an author to hear about her work!
All the best
Penny
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Vivid and tense with a satisfying ending–what a relief!
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Dear Karen
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m glad you found the ending satisfying – I found it difficult to obtain he effect I wanted, and even after a dozen attempts I still wasn’t sure it worked. ‘Happy’ endings are more difficult, I think- for flash fiction anyway.
All the best
Penny
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Usually, you read a post and comment on that. In my case, it was quite the opposite.
When i read your comments on fellow blogger’s posts, i was compelled to open your link.
Your comments are insightful, critical, descriptive.
As for going solo, you have successfully captured the inquisitiveness and energy of a fourteen year old. And yes even i feared a sad ending which you have successfully averted. The cultural shock, the tension inside the room have been captured beautifully.
Liked the description, “The draped samples of cloth darkened the shop”
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Dear Rituational
What a lovely comment you’ve written; thank you so much.
With very best wishes
Penny
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There is a distinctive balance in this story. I enjoyed the way it flowed from outside boat to inside to outside to inside shop, but not right inside. Phew. So glad Darcey ‘escaped’ I could not help but fear the worst.
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Dear Kelvin
Thank you for reading and commenting. I’m interested in your comment about flow. It wasn’t a conscious structural thought – what was in my mind was that Darcey hated feeling restricted, so an environment that made her feel trapped would be highly stressful. That’s why the description of the shop mirrors the description of the cabin and the ship, as being enclosed and oppressive.
With best wishes
Penny
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wow – you gave a lot of thrill and suspense with this (nice job) and I went from smelling the spice to then the blood and then the escape –
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Dear prior
Thank you very much for reading and commenting.
With best wishes
Penny
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A different world. I hope she got back to the ship in one piece (and not laden own with souvenirs she never actually wanted in the first place!).
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Have no fear, Ali! She returned safe and sound – and was grounded by her Mom for a month!
Thanks for reading and commenting.
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I got the feeling that Darcey over-reacted not that I would advise any young girl to travel alone to foreign places! The best part about this piece was that I felt I was there, seeing hearing and smelling (despite a blocked nose!) Very well described Penny 🙂
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